If you don't have Megacoat, try wearing the following:

socks
undergarments
silk long johns
thick jeans
undershirt
t-shirt
sweater
fleece over-sweater
wool coat
giant thick scarf
wool hat
leather fleece-lined mitts
ski goggles
bad-ass winter boots

I thought people would stare at me in this getup, but as it turns out, no one gives a shit when the weather gets this cold. People will wear whatever they can to stay warm, and if that includes giant ski goggles, so be it. I can now safely say that I walked 40 minutes in -26 weather (which apparently felt like -39 with the wind chill) and I was toasty warm except for my thighs.

I couldn't feel my thighs at all.

No, seriously, I kept hitting them with my mitts and I couldn't feel a fucking thing.

But now the feeling is coming back! Tingle tingle.

Next year I hope to buy a longer coat so that I don't lose my thighs in a tragic walking-to-work-in-the-cold accident.

Now if I can just survive the walk home....

9 comments:

Milan said...

My brother is coming to visit next week. I have warned him several times about the cold, and he has always brushed it off with a laugh.

We will see how his Vancouver temperament fares, when presented with one of the more savage points in an Ottawa winter.

Stella said...

I hear people lose their tolerance for cold pretty quickly when they live in warmer areas for any length of time....

I have a new respect for Ottawans for being so dang hardcore about their weather.

Shawna said...

You are awesome. Namely for the ski goggles.

I've been liking the cold, although it's not as bad here. Nobody dresses for it, but luckily I've outgrown my "not wearing a hat is cool" stage and am more than happy to layer everything to be comfortable.

Try adding one of those "headband" ear covering things under your hat. Double coverage for when those earlobes start to peek out.

Amanda said...

snow pants.

Hannah said...

Hi,
New fellow Ottawa blogger here.:)
Your list of essential clothing items to survive in Ottawa's winter is spot on! Though my legs always manage freezing too, despite the thick, extra-itchy long johns that are under my pants.:) Odd.

Stella said...

Shawna: A headband! Spot on! I will be sexually unappealing with my goggles, scarves and giant boots, but at least I'll be toasty warm.

Amanda: Snow pants! Spot on! Why not add to the carnage, right?

Hannah: Welcome to the Ottawa blogosphere, or whatever it is they call it... I think Amanda's suggestion of snow pants will save our poor legs.

XUP said...

Snow pants or some of those winter running pants which aren't as bulky. It's a very strange kind of cold. For the 1st 15 minutes I was fine, then whammo everything was frozen. Then things got painful.

Shawna said...

ps: Where are the pictures of this???

Stella said...

I will be posting a picture tonight!