Hella Stella

First of all, you guys are charming. I write what I think is the most boring post EVAR and you still comment. Love to you. Responses coming.

Other things:

I'm thinking of shaving half my head. Not the underside like I used to... Just the left half. And I want patterns shaved into it. And I'm also planning two rather large tattoos.

I've always felt that I looked too tame on the outside. Maybe this is the start of the transition towards properly reflecting my trucker mouth / dirty mind. I welcome it. Honestly, I think working a safe office job is making me go a little nutso. Time to break out! BLAMMO!

Speaking of breaking out, it looks like there might be a high school reunion for my class this summer. We all keep in touch over Facebook, but it will be very fucking strange to see everyone in person. Awesome, probably, but strange. Some of my best friends are people I knew in high school, so I see them all the time, but for the majority? I probably haven't laid eyes on them since prom. The same prom where I drank my face off, crawled around in agony on my hotel room floor, got stranded in a dive bar called the Rum Shack, and lost most of my graduating class as soon as dinner was done.

Oh yeah, THAT prom.

Don't ask me how it all played out, because I don't remember much more than that.

I wonder what my 19-year-old self would have thought of Current Me....

She would have congratulated me for nabbing such a hottie, definitely. She would be super into my bulldogs. She'd love that I'm still recording music. She'd probably think my job was suffocating, but three out of four isn't bad. Come to think of it, she'd totally high five me for buying a house in my favourite neighbourhood. Dude, I didn't do too badly!

Hello puppies!

First off, in local blog news, I find this exchange highly entertaining. Mayfair Theatre vs. Preacher. Check it out.

I had a very full weekend... Stomach full, activity full, you name it.

- I had breakfast with some fun people and got served by the same bitchy waitress I always end up with there. She's so bitchy! It boggles my mind. Why does she serve when she hates talking to people? And bringing their food? And getting their bills? WHY?

- We showed the apartment at the new house to some prospective tenants (we don't know if they're taking it yet). We found out that we actually know someone who grew up in our house. Ottawa is so small. The house still looks awesome. I want to live there RIGHT NOW.

- My BH and I went up to Chelsea for a kick-ass dinner with friends. Morty humped their dog in the face about thirty separate times. In front of the children. Morty is such a dirt bag.

- I went to an art show and hung out with my neighbours. I drooled over some of Mae's art, which I found by surprise when I was wandering around the venue. She's good, y'all. Really good.

- My BH and I spent some quality time together, and sorry to cheese out on you, but I think I fell even more in love with him. Did you know we started dating ten years ago this June? Truth.

- I spent time with my folks and my Bubbi. We ate some excellent food. I drank something sparkly.

- I decided to stop putting it off and started planning a shoulder tattoo.

- It was High School Boyfriend's birthday, so a bunch of old friends got together for a beer. I gave HSB a card that made me laugh so hard, tears were streaming down my cheeks. I think maybe he didn't like it as much as I did. I know because he did his lifty eyebrow thing. Oh well. At least there was beer.

- We found out that our good friends are having a baby! A BABY! This is the first baby announcement within our close circle of buddies. I'm so excited for them.

- Our bad neighbours with the bad dogs got worse. They are still off leash. One of the dogs got too close to a little baby, and barked angrily. It also harassed a few more dogs in the area. We all called bylaw. I'm not sure what else we can do.

(Also, can I tell you something about these trashy neighbours? It's really nasty. Don't read on if you can't handle the filth. A few days ago, we drove by their house with a friend of ours on our way to a BBQ, and they appeared to be.... Ugh.... Having sex on their ratty outdoor couch. I'm not a prude, but sweet Jesus, I will never burn that image from my mind).

On that note.... Well.... I've got nothing to make that better. Sorry. Dirty outdoor couch sex is just as gross as it sounds.

For all the craziness that has taken over as of late, I haven't had a nervous breakdown. Yet.

We'll see how that goes as the momentum builds and then I faceplant! Ahem.

In the meantime, I'm getting very excited about New Years, and greatly enjoying my Christmas gifts. Especially the bulldog shirt.

I played a house concert this past weekend.... I know I didn't mention it here, but it was really low key and built for a tiny crowd. We got just the right number of people out and I even played some very new (and very old) songs. Stuff like that is welcomed at a house concert. Not always the case at a bar.

Anyway, the show was lovely. We (Shawna, Brian and myself) had mulled wine and chatted with the folks who showed up. High School Boyfriend even came bearing home-baked gifts and alcoholic beverages. Yay for me! Yay for HSB!

In other news, the renovations from hell continue unabated at my apartment. Well, technically in the apartment above us, but it's so damn loud you wouldn't know the difference.

The other day, a guy was in here patching up some drywall after they ACCIDENTALLY BLEW A HOLE IN OUR WALL. We had the following conversation:

Him: So I guess the renovations have been pretty annoying for you, hey?

Me: Yeah, they are pretty shitty.

Him: I suppose the sound gets really bad.

Me: The sound is bad, but I'm also pretty peeved that the roofers and contractors seem to think we can't see them peeing out the back of the building.

Him: Uh, what?

Me: Yeah, I can see them all though the bedroom window, peeing away. My apartment isn't a toilet, you know. I can't believe how many wangs I've seen in the past month. It's getting kind of tiresome.

Him: ..... UM.

Me: (muttering) Fucking wangfest.


But in all seriousness, I have seen a lot of wangs this month. And yes, I'm complaining about it.

Oh, the Cameron gig was fun. Other than getting to visit with Shawna, which is always a highlight, the night just went swimmingly.



Before the show, Shawna, Brian and I grabbed some dinner at a local restaurant called the Village Idiot Pub. The food was great, and Sook Yin Lee wandered in halfway through the meal. I tried very hard not to picture her as I remember her in Shortbus, but that turned out to be impossible.... As you can imagine. Try not staring when you've seen someone doing hot, graphic things on screen.

The crowd was great... And I got to visit with some lovely people. HSB had recently moved to Toronto, so he came and somehow got me to see how many marshmallows I could fit in my mouth (five, which seems low to me, boo). Every seat in the house was taken and we may have actually made money, even with the car rental and restaurant visits.

Aaand, that's all I've got. More soon when my brain starts working. Tah babies!

So many things to say.

First, OCFF is this weekend. I'm playing twice, both tonight at completely ungodly hours in the morning. When I know I'm going to be low on sleep, I get this deep feeling of dread in my stomach. I'm a bit nuts when I haven't slept. Then I just dive in and everything is fine - when you're surrounded by so many great musicians, a little sleep is an easy trade. That being said, I will probably sleep until noon tomorrow.

In other news, I have joined a choir. A church choir, no less. Background story!

When I was a kid, choir was a huge part of my life. I rehearsed twice a week, sometimes more, depending on how many groups I was in. This continued throughout my teenage years when I studied music at my arts high school.

But when high school was done? No choir. No classical music at all, actually. I played in bands, and that was the extent of my musical activities. I've been missing choir like crazy these past few years. Last week, I looked up different choirs in the city to see if any of them peaked my interest. The best ones all have scary-looking auditions, which makes sense, but not something I want to subject myself to at this point. I decided to leave my choir yearnings on the back burner until next year.

Then the universe handed me a big present. My high school music teacher sent a mass e-mail asking if anyone would like to join his church choir. They are singing all seven movements of this piece for their Christmas concert, and they need some reinforcements. I wrote back expressing my interest, and he called me back about a minute after I pressed send. He and I always got along swimmingly, and we chatted for ages before we started talking about the actual choir.

Last night was the rehearsal, and dude, it's SO COOL and also SO WEIRD to be in choir again. This time it's a little different, because I am the youngest person there by about, oh, forty years. Okay, maybe twenty. No, maybe forty. Also, as I mentioned, my high school music teacher is running the choir, so I feel like I've been sucked into a time vacuum and spat out when I was about sixteen. He hasn't changed at all! His erratic hand movements, his goofy falsetto, his pencil throwing, his bag of grapes.....

There was one other girl at rehearsal who I went to school with, and halfway through the practice, we both turned to each other at the same time and said, "SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE."

Anyway. I'll be in this choir until Christmas, and then I may join my high school alumni choir in January. I've got to say... I've only got one shaky rehearsal under my belt, but it is so nice to be surrounded by choral harmonies again. Like a big, warm blanket. So worth it.

On an unrelated note... I think I should hibernate this winter (besides choir practice, obvs). I'm feeling a little over extended with my gigging. For whatever reason, having regular gigs seemed easier when I had classes and a few part time jobs. I don't know why I find it so much harder now that I work full time. Technically, it should be easier, because my schedule is more predictable. But it's not, and at this point, it would be better if I took on fewer gigs so that I can spend my spare time writing and learning new things. Nothing sucks worse than a stale song.

I'll still be gigging... I'll just be a little pickier about when shows I take on. My fabulous cousin Brian has offered me full use of his home studio, so I may even get a bit of recording done. YES PLEASE.

I like the transition that happens to my fingertips when music really picks up. They go from being soft and squishy to being rock hard and rough. When I tap them on a table top, they go click click click instead of thump thump thump.

It makes me feel like I'm getting things done. Physical evidence that I'm practicing, right?

We had a rehearsal last night for the Vinyl Cafe show. Did I tell you that I'm bringing two bandmates with me instead of one? Brian will be there, of course, and so will Jeff. Jeff has grown a giant beard since I last saw him, and he officially looks like a lumberjack.

I'm not exaggerating when I say that hearing them both sing harmony on my songs gives me full-body shivers. It's just so nice, and they are both so good. Sometimes I'm amazed that I get to play with them. They make me look like I know what I'm doing.

I also think they are both pretty thrilled to be part of the show. Jeff said his parents freaked out when they heard. I just hope the tickets aren't gone - does anyone know if both nights are full? I don't really understand the Ticketmaster site.

Tomorrow is my friends' wedding. Their gift came in the mail yesterday, so other than losing the invite and not having an outfit picked out, I'm ready to go. I wrote HSB to find out the details, because it would be so incredibly lame to show up at the wrong church. I imagine the invite was misplaced while I reorganizing my desk. Cruel, cruel irony.

Providing I show up at the right place, I think it will be a great time. It will give me a chance to disconnect my brain from gig nervousness. I'm getting my hair re-striped tonight, so at at very least I will have proper platinum to brown contrasting. That will surely distract people from the fact that I'll be wearing a paper bag.

I wrote another piece of song yesterday - I think the trick is to sneak to the bedroom while Morty is sleeping, and start playing before he wakes up and tries to join me. That way he'll hear the guitar and be too scared to follow.

Having a dog who is frightened of instruments is tough. I love that pup, but how he ended up with a banjo phobia is beyond me. I'm a freaking songwriter. It's what I do.

(Actually, it might be even worse if Morty did this)

Strangely, while he's scared of my instruments, he's a total tough guy on walks and tries to take off people's legs if they come to close to me without warning. Very protective. I pity the fool who tries to mug me. The last thing they'll see is a giant drooling bulldog flying through the air.

I had a nice talk with HSB last night about all the potential awkward moments that may present themselves at this upcoming wedding. It's just going to be one of those odd situations where everybody has dated each other at some point, and now we have to manage the sea of exes and burned bridges that follow. I was planning on pre-drinking a bit, but it might be easier if I arrive drunk.

I'm only partially kidding. There's a good chance it'll just be awesome fun and nothing awkward will happen at all. I'm just trying to be prepared.

Funny that I've mapped out the possible personal clashes, but I haven't bothered to find an outfit! I'm thinking fishnets.

And maybe a dress.

I'm off work today, so I'm making an effort to be a better blogger and actually write a post with pictures. AMAZING.

Music News:

Remember how I told you that the Vinyl Cafe was going to play one of my songs on their show over the weekend? They played it both Saturday and Sunday, and it was just as exciting as the first time I heard my songs on the air. I got all squealy. Picture me, ear on the speaker, going, "SQUEEEEEEEEE!" That's pretty much how it went down.

It was also neat to watch my stat counter and see people finding my music site from all across Canada and the US. Who knew that show had so many dang listeners? I mean, I figured as much... But seeing those numbers spike was tres cool. It also made me wonder if I should change my name for the next album, because shit, my real name is not catchy. I'm not sure a single person searching me spelled it right. On a practical level, that's not good for marketing.

And since I'm blathering on so much about music... I met with a filmmaker yesterday who is going to make me a music video! Like, a real one! One I can play on the television! The weird thing is that he originally contacted me to use one of my songs in his short film, and after chatting a bit, we realized that he went to high school with my BH.

Small freaking world.

I played him the only song I've got written for the new album, and he gave me a run-down of how he'd like to film it. It involves a snow storm, so it's a good thing we live in Ottawa! Free props. He's also going to take care of finding grant money, because he was sent straight from heaven.

Non-Music News:

My BH and I had planned to go to a wedding shower Saturday, and then to Irene's to see Brian play. Instead, my BH got called into work, and I headed down to the shower alone.

The shower was full of friends from high school, including High School Boyfriend* and a variety of people I used to hang out with every second of every day. Some of them now have babies. Am I ever going to get used to that? I don't think so. My friend introduced me to her son, and all I could think about was when we used to hang out at her house and eat boxes of brandy beans to try and get drunk.

True story. We had real class.

Anyway. It's been pretty neat to reconnect with those old friends. I still love them to bits, and it's kinda cool to see them all growing up. Scary, but cool. We're at the stage where people are pretending not to see those one or two grey hairs cropping up. For the record, I love young guys with grey hair, so I'm quite enjoying the shift. I just have to remember not to point it out with so much enthusiasm.

I drank several plastic cups of beer at the shower, ate no less than four mini cupcakes, and headed down to Irene's to catch Brian's set.

He was awesome, and I was drunk.

*HSB gave me a belated birthday present, and YAY, it's a book! I think we've been gifting each other books for the past few years, and it's never a disappointment.

It turned out to be a very busy weekend - one which I'll break down in a numbered list, because you all now how much I love that.

1. Tarts n' Crafts was excellent. My co-seller and I sold more pussy pops than we could have hoped for, and there were only two left at the end of the day. Proud! I picked one up for Zoom, as promised, because chocolate pussy on a stick cures what ails ya. Or at least, it makes the bad stuff seem a lot better. I also bought a stuffed owl from my friend Haley of Swing Low Studio. The owl's new name is VEEB (loosely for Venus Envy Bursary, I added the extra E for emphasis), and Morty wants to eat him SO BAD. I actually had to hide VEEB the minute I got home, because I saw the look in Morty's eyes... It was one of lusty passion. Poor little VEEB. Destined to live on a high shelf.

2. Hung out with two good friends from my teenage days, one of which being High School Boyfriend. Gave them both a pussy pop. Ate Ethiopian food. Discussed weddings and real estate. I believe someone called me self-important, not terribly seriously, and it occurred to me that I am far less sensitive now than I am All Grown Up. Apparently things have changed since I was 16. I care 97% less about interpersonal drama. My reaction when I was younger was often to blow things out of proportion. My reaction now is to roll my eyes and boot someone in the ass. Anyway, we're all going to be at a wedding in about a month, along with everyone else we used to go to school with. It's going to be fun, although I think I will pre-drink in case my newfound maturity trips up in the face of my entire graduating class. I may or may not have been known for flashing my bits at people with my partner in crime (Hi Haley!).

3. Went to the garden centre with my mum and froze my tits off. Seriously, it was so damn cold. We picked up some veggies for planting and then went back home to dye my mum's hair. It was a great Mother's Day activity! She looks fabulous with her new colour. Turns out she didn't start getting greys until she was past forty, and I actually had to mask my disappointment. If I'm the same way, it'll be a long time to wait until I can have the silver streak I was looking forward to. I know, I plan hair styles a bit far in advance...

4. Saw Junior Boys at Babylon. People? This band rocked my pants off. True to form, I squeezed my way to the front of the stage until I was standing right in front of the band's lead singer. I was literally a few feet away - the only thing separating us was his monitor (I'm only 5'2, so I have no qualms moving steadily through the crowd until I've got a good view - being timid about it means I can't see a damn thing). It was amazing. He has such a great voice, and he really knows how to entertain. Meanwhile, his bandmate literally just played a giant computer and looked bored, occasionally flipping his hipster hair back. The singer pretty much carried the show. I guess I can sympathize a bit... This was the last night of a six-week tour. I might look bored and moody too (okay, probably not).

Tonight I'm off to see Star Trek with the gang. I used to watch the original series a bit obsessively, but never got hooked on next gen... I'm excited to see what they've done with this film.