Hella Stella

Hello puppies!

First off, in local blog news, I find this exchange highly entertaining. Mayfair Theatre vs. Preacher. Check it out.

I had a very full weekend... Stomach full, activity full, you name it.

- I had breakfast with some fun people and got served by the same bitchy waitress I always end up with there. She's so bitchy! It boggles my mind. Why does she serve when she hates talking to people? And bringing their food? And getting their bills? WHY?

- We showed the apartment at the new house to some prospective tenants (we don't know if they're taking it yet). We found out that we actually know someone who grew up in our house. Ottawa is so small. The house still looks awesome. I want to live there RIGHT NOW.

- My BH and I went up to Chelsea for a kick-ass dinner with friends. Morty humped their dog in the face about thirty separate times. In front of the children. Morty is such a dirt bag.

- I went to an art show and hung out with my neighbours. I drooled over some of Mae's art, which I found by surprise when I was wandering around the venue. She's good, y'all. Really good.

- My BH and I spent some quality time together, and sorry to cheese out on you, but I think I fell even more in love with him. Did you know we started dating ten years ago this June? Truth.

- I spent time with my folks and my Bubbi. We ate some excellent food. I drank something sparkly.

- I decided to stop putting it off and started planning a shoulder tattoo.

- It was High School Boyfriend's birthday, so a bunch of old friends got together for a beer. I gave HSB a card that made me laugh so hard, tears were streaming down my cheeks. I think maybe he didn't like it as much as I did. I know because he did his lifty eyebrow thing. Oh well. At least there was beer.

- We found out that our good friends are having a baby! A BABY! This is the first baby announcement within our close circle of buddies. I'm so excited for them.

- Our bad neighbours with the bad dogs got worse. They are still off leash. One of the dogs got too close to a little baby, and barked angrily. It also harassed a few more dogs in the area. We all called bylaw. I'm not sure what else we can do.

(Also, can I tell you something about these trashy neighbours? It's really nasty. Don't read on if you can't handle the filth. A few days ago, we drove by their house with a friend of ours on our way to a BBQ, and they appeared to be.... Ugh.... Having sex on their ratty outdoor couch. I'm not a prude, but sweet Jesus, I will never burn that image from my mind).

On that note.... Well.... I've got nothing to make that better. Sorry. Dirty outdoor couch sex is just as gross as it sounds.

I'm becoming an absentee blogger! Bad Stella.

I'm afraid I have nothing particularly exciting to report, but I can give you the rundown on my comings and goings anyway.

1. Ongoing renovations aka My landlord is a jackass

It has actually become a bit of a joke. Every morning at 8am, we are startled by some new deafening sound caused by the destruction of part of the house. This morning it was the sound of giant metal scaffolding being assembled outside my bedroom window, followed by the sound of a giant drill going through the exterior of the building to prep it for siding. Siding! Do you have any idea how much hammering it's going to take to put siding up? My poor nerves. The other day it was the sound of our basement wall getting knocked out with sledgehammers. In case you were wondering, we don't get a warning about any of these jobs ahead of time. I know that's illegal, but I'm past the point of caring. I just need to get out.

2. New neighbours

We have two new neighbours on the street who, I'm sorry to say, are really not cool. They have two large dogs, one a pit bull, one a shepherd, and they walk them off leash all the time. Did I mention that both dogs are aggressive? As are the owners? Yes, it is a sticky situation. I have come to the conclusion that I will absolutely kick their dogs in the teeth if they try and attack Morty one more time. If that sounds harsh, keep in mind that watching Morty fight off two large angry dogs is not a nice alternative either. Unfortunately, the owners so far seem unwilling to listen to reason, and were walking them off leash again this morning. The situation makes me so anxious I actually feel sick about it.

3. We really did buy a house

We don't get possession of the house until late May, but I'm planning as best I can in the meantime. I have lists upon lists upon lists of things I need to do, pay for, or get ready to pay for. I'm not sure yet if the lists are helping yet. They are just do damn long. Also? I'm nearly out of money.

4. Music!

I have two great gigs booked for May, and then I'll probably take another gigging break while we move into the house. As I mentioned in a previous post, I really am trying to build a tiny studio into a closet as part of our house renos. I think that will make me feel very happy. I guess you'll hear about it soon enough.

5. Death and near death

In the past week, we've had one family friend slip into a coma after a stroke, and the mother of another friend die. It's got both my BH and I thinking a lot about how we want to live our lives. Live each day to the fullest, etc etc, embrace that cliche a little more than we have been. On a more practical note, it also makes me want to write a will.

Jeez, I didn't mean to sound that morose.... But there you have it.

I hope you have a very sunny spring day, folks.

The fact that I adopted a puppy might have sounded ironic to those of you who know me well, because I have always been a bit afraid of dogs.

I seem to attract the more aggressive ones, the ones that nip, bark and lunge (similar to the way I attract the weirdos on the bus or the sociopaths on the walk home). As such, I've always been very cautious around large dogs that can overpower me.

I've let go of that fear recently, because Morty has taught me the basics of what makes a dog tick. I'm a lot more at ease around dogs, or at least, I don't cross the street to avoid them.

For that reason, I didn't think twice when I went with Morty to the dog park yesterday. I would keep him on leash, let him meet some other doggies, and then go home.

You can imagine my panic when, after ten minutes of casual socializing with the dogs and their humans, Morty and I both got swarmed by five very large dogs, and we were both bitten. I literally had a big chocolate lab hanging off my arm at one point, and had to yell for help before any of the owners did a fucking thing.

So I'm back to square one, not willing to take Morty back there without my BH and maybe a panther to keep away aggressive asshole dogs. And I'm sorry, but if you know your dog has some behavioural problems, don't be a piece of shit and take them off leash around other people and their pets. If your dog attacks people or animals for kicks, take them off leash in your own backyard or in the countryside. Don't take the chance that they might grab some girl by the arm and try to gnaw off her puppy's leg. Got that, fuckface dog owner?

I was so surprised by the whole thing that I pretty much scooped up a traumatized Morty, speed walked out of the park, and shook the whole way home. The finger that the dog bit actually still aches today, although my arm is feeling fine now. Morty was bleeding, and I felt like the worst dog mommy in the world. I changed into pajamas and watched Dodgeball with Morty until my BH came home and cuddled us better. We let Morty sleep in our bed last night; a rare event that pleases him greatly because he somehow manages to spoon us both at the same time.

Now I'm trying to think of something cheerful to tell you all. Can't very well end on a bleeding puppy note, can I?

Well, I'm going to see my financial planner tonight. I loves me some financial planning. I am doing some anticipatory calculations just for fun.

I think that's as good as it gets today. Sorry folks.