Hella Stella

So I've joined Twitter.

Remember that time I fell off the face of the earth and forgot to update my blog? Dang.

Colour me shocked.

I feel like my life is in a holding pattern at the moment, which is probably why I'm not blogging as much as usual. I'm going through the motions, doing my everyday stuff, but it's all overshadowed by the looming album prep.

Here's the funny thing: it's not like I'm working around the clock on the CD. Quite the opposite. The only "work" I'm doing right now is helping develop the new web site, planning finances, sorting out my promo ideas, and waiting for my next studio session. It's just that this big goal is weighing on my brain, and it will continue to do so until it's finished. I like the weight - it reminds me of what I'm good at.

The challenge is to think of other things to talk about while my thoughts are stuck on a hamster wheel.

I know... How about French verbs? Do you know how spectacularly bad I am at French verbs, even though I can understand and speak the language without much issue? It's embarrassing, frankly, but I'm too stubborn to give up this easily. Here's my problem: I look at a French verb conjugation question, my brain says "THIS IS LIKE MATH! AAAAH!" and then I freeze. No matter how many tricks I memorize, how many times I go over verb charts, my brain has a seizure and runs away.

However, because I need to improve, I also need to find a way to understand something that insists on remaining abstract and distant. My coworker suggested I start reading in French, more than just work e-mails, to normalize how all these exercises are used in regular conversation. I think that's a great idea. Here's hoping I don't crash and burn. I think I'll start with Harry Potter in French, so I like the story enough to continue.

I could also talk about my dogs, which would be strange and unusual for me.

If you've been reading here a while, you may remember that when we got Frida last year, the transition to a two-dog household was anything but smooth. Both dogs were freaked out, they didn't get along, and Morty was sad. It was the worst.

It's been almost a year since that shitty time, and dudes, it's like night and day. Not only do they love each other, but they nap together (imagine limbs all entwined, porky bulldog dreams, and nuzzling), and they occasionally share toys.

THEY SHARE TOYS.

For about 8 months, whenever Frida would show interest in a toy, Morty would stroll over, knock her out of the way, and remove the plushie in question. Now, astoundingly, they can both chew on either end of a toy and be quite comfortable. It's a delightful transition.

And that concludes today's rambling post about French verbs, porky bulldogs, and heavy brains. Holy shit, I need to get out more.

Now that the album prep is in full swing, I'm being asked a lot of questions about my plans. Titles, song arrangements, design ideas, etc.

It's been tough deciding how much info to divulge before I start to censor... And this is for a few reasons. Mainly this: I question my judgement when I get too much input.

Last time I released an album, I let others guide me through the process. I got a lot of advice, weighed my options, and tried to make the best choices given what I had been told.

The thing is, after it was all done, I realized that I would have been much happier with my original ideas. I didn't like some of the things I tried; I didn't like how I had let myself be swayed by people's comments and suggestions.

So I think I'm done. Unless I deem it completely harmless, I'm not going to share too many album details until the work is finished. When it comes to creative projects, my gut seems to know what it's doing.... And I'm thankful for that.

Some things that are moving forward:

- The new website should be up by April! Squeee!

- I'm rehearsing this week with my drummer, and we record together next weekend.

- I have another new song, and I like it.


In unrelated news, look at my adorable dogs:

I read a lot of blogs, and on those blogs I keep hearing people say that they are ready for spring.

Ready for spring? Ready for spring??

I'm going to hope that the people writing such things live in a warm part of the US, because I am just hunkering down for winter. January is going fast, certainly, but February and March have yet to arrive. I suspect they will kick our collective asses.

I guess what I'm trying to say is.... I can't think about spring yet. Too soon.

Speaking of hunkering down, the new album seems to be shaping up around a theme of hibernation. I like that. I also got a sneak peek at my new press shots, and I am super excited to get the finished product in my hands. According to my BH, I look angry in them. Great! This album already feels a lot moodier than the last one, so bring it on.

I'm also *tentatively* talking with someone about redesigning my web site. I say *tentatively* because I don't want to jinx the process... Do you know how hard it's been to find a fully-trained web designer? Good lord, if I knew there was such a shortage, I would have gotten myself trained up ages ago. Fingers crossed that they are cool, and that I can afford their services.

This weekend I plan to clean the house. For some reason, I have trouble motivating myself to do serious cleaning on weeknights. I'm saving it all up for Sunday, I guess.

Have a good weekend!

It's really winter this time.

We had a drastic thaw not long ago, and although I'm not a huge fan of the cold, I found myself missing the snow. Part of that was because I prefer full-on winter over transition weather, but I also don't like how messy my yard gets when it's wet with no snow.

A section of the canal is even opening this weekend! (Not this section, just so we're clear)




Although I've nurtured a lifelong hatred of winter sports, I do plan on buying skates, and I also hope to learn cross-country skiing. We'll see if either of those things happen this winter.

This is a print I bought for Shawna, gave to her, and then bought one for myself because I liked it so much. Now we're art buddies.

I kinda want a spoof version that says "Do WHO you love," but that's just me.

In completely unrelated news, it feels so good not to be gigging right now. I've got something booked for April, but unless I get an irresistible offer, I'm going to stay away from shows for the winter. There's plenty on my plate without gigging - I've got an entire recording program to learn, not to mention a whole lot of songs wanting to be written. Oh, and an album to record.

What was I thinking?

Anyway, it's probably a good way to spend the winter. Maybe I'll spend every winter recording an album. I hibernate when it gets cold, so it might actually be the perfect winter activity.

Huh. I love brainstorming on the blog. Look what I come up with! WINTER RECORDING MANIA.

My BH started his new job today. I'm still waiting to hear how it went, but dudes, we are officially a two-income household!! Woot! May the debt repayment begin post-haste.

In other news, I cut all my hair off. Probably about six inches gone. I feel so light! Although the longer hair was fun, it's also a lot more work. Let's face it - if I can avoid my brush and my hair dryer every morning, I'll do it. I'd much rather spend my precious morning hour snuggling the dogs.

So... Having a car is quite something. It's only been ours for couple of weeks, but man, it sure is great to be able to make plans without relying on shitty OC Transpo. I used to love taking the bus, but they earned my wrath with the Strike To End All Strikes. Hey, at least that PR fail got me walking to work.

Besides the new job and the car, I've been filling my time with:

- Counting down the minutes until Harry Potter comes to the big screen again.

- Enjoying our new (but very much on sale) couch, which fits two adults and two dogs with lots of room. Luxurious.

- Planning what sorts of tasty lunch foods I can make for my BH. It may sound weird, but I love packing him a lunch. Truth.

- Watching every episode of Vag Magazine, because it's so damn witty.

- Picking out some courses I can take this summer. Hint: they have nothing to do with any of my current jobs, but might involve power tools.

I'm also working on the next album, although mostly in the planning phase.... I'd like to find out which CD manufacturers are the best so that I can price them all out. I've been using the same company for years, and although they have been fine, I want to know what my options are.

But enough about me. How are y'all doing?

Some quick things while I'm rushing around:

1. The Colombian arrives today. God knows when I'll see him, because his planning sucks so majorly, but at least we'll be in the same city for a few days. I wonder if I can get him out to my Wakefield gig on Saturday.... Actually, never mind. He'd arrive four hours after the show was finished. (Oh hey, I'm playing in Wakefield Saturday. Y'all are invited, as always.)

2. I'm playing at the NAC Fourth Stage tonight in a benefit for a public school's arts program. I love playing the Fourth Stage, so I'm thrilled. Also? Christmas dinners are piling up, so I could use the extra cash. I sure hope the audience is in the mood for CDs.

3. While I've been obsessed with Dan Black's Un record for some time now, I've entered a whole new level of appreciation for him lately. Partly because I think he's a fantastic songwriter, artist and all around crazy dude, but also because I can't seem to cover his songs. Usually I can manage a pretty decent cover, but every time I play his stuff, I find myself longing for his version. He's just so GOOD. I can't pull off what he pulls off. I love you, Dan Black. Please keep making music. Also, Cocoon and Let Go break my heart into a million pieces every time I listen to them.

4. Christmas baking has begun, and I'm getting fat. I'm not usually one to care about a few extra pounds over the holiday season, buy holy fuck dudes, it's not even December yet. Must slow down. There's delicious curves, and then there's delicious curves, if you catch my drift.

5. I have a couple more gifts to order, and then I'm all done my Christmas shopping. Packages seem to be arriving in the mail every second day. It's excellent fun.

6. Grant applications are making my brain ache. I'm making several backup plans in case I need to finance my own recording again, even though that will make me so much more broke than I am right now. It's going to be quite a process, so be patient with me. I'm thankful that my BH will be working soon - all the more room to funnel money into my music addiction!

I did something scary this weekend. Not horror movie scary, but personal risk scary. Let me rewind.

Months ago, my BH and I were chatting about my next album and what it might sound like. He asked me who my dream producer would be, and I told him - we'll call the producer Karl. He asked why I haven't contacted him, and I responded simply that he was way too cool to talk to someone like me. I'm a huge fan of this guy, and I could see no reason why he would ever want to chat with a broke songwriter.

Fast forward to last Friday.

I was daydreaming about the album, I looked up Karl's website, and I sent 100% shameless fan mail to him. I also mentioned that I would love it if he would consider producing my next project.

Not only did he respond, telling me he had listened to (and loved) my songs, but he also called me last night to talk about the album. Called ME.

During the conversation, I had to shut down the part of my brain that was shouting "This guy is too cool for you! Don't waste his time!" It was nerve wracking, partly because I respect his work so much, and partly because I am not really ready to start recording. This is the planning phase for the album. The phase where I start writing songs and grant applications. Not the phase where I drive to Montreal and start laying down studio tracks. I mean, to be honest, I never really expected him to respond to my e-mail in the first place, so I wasn't as concerned with the timing of things.

Luckily, he was okay with that.

Now of course I am incredibly concerned with the timing of things. I'm writing up a giant to do list to avoid feeling in over my head. It's too late for that though - I feel completely in over my head.

I'm not sure yet if he'll actually end up producing me, but in the meantime he's given me loads of contacts and a few places to start from.

Scary. But really damn cool.

So. That video about songwriting.

I've tried to upload it three times, and it's simply not working. Last time I left it for three hours before it finally shut my computer down.

Since it is causing me immense frustration, I'm going to tell the video to suck it and I'll make a proper songwriting list instead. I'm good at lists. Video? Not so much.

I'm glad so many of you enjoyed seeing Morty wrapped up in Snuggie goodness. He was adorable and grunty the whole time. I should clarify a few things, however:

1. The Snuggie is not mine. It belongs to my dear friend Heather, who brought it over after we had dim sum yesterday. We have decided to do a series of Snuggie-related projects, some of which involve wearing the Snuggie in public and taking photos to preserve the moment. Her father has an extra Snuggie, so we can do these stunts together, as nature intended.

2. I find the Snuggie, in reality, completely and utterly ridiculous. Besides the fact that it is nothing but a giant blanket with arms, I also far prefer the comfort of a good blanket when I'm trying to stay warm. Heather's Snuggie was so big that it trailed about a meter on the floor behind me (granted, I'm short). The sleeves were about the lenth of my entire body. How is that practical? And how do the kids in the commercial even manage that awkward high-five??

3. Morty was actually a bit perturbed by the Snuggie, but then he tried to love it up, so I think he's changing his mind. DOMINATE THE SNUGGIE.

Not that you could tell, but I was gone all day Saturday. My BH and I drove to Toronto on a whim, going there and back in one day. It would have actually been great if we hadn't hit a storm on the way home, right around the same time we realized that our borrowed car did not have winter tires. It was a very nervous ride, and a couple of times we were sure we wouldn't be able to stop. We made it home at 3am, and I'm still feeling worse for wear.

Why would we drive to Toronto if we can only go for one day, you ask? A few reasons.

If we had our own car, we would have stayed overnight. We don't, and given our time restraints, we thought we'd rather go for a day than not at all. We also have a few things we love to do in Toronto, and they don't take a whole lot of time. They are mostly within walking distance of our parking garage, and then we always finish the day by having dinner in Little India. This is conveniently around the corner from the highway.

We were also going stir crazy, and a quick jaunt out of town was all we needed. We got some kick-ass chocolate, a bunch of new music, some great books, and we ate at two of our favourite restaurants. We even got to visit Shawna! It was excellent quality time.

I'm already planning another trip back, but this time we'll stay overnight. That way we can fit in more eating and poking around on King St. E. I love that area.

Perhaps the greatest part of our trip was the time we got to spend together. When we're at home, we're often doing chores or watching a movie or playing with Morty. This doesn't leave a lot of time for good conversation. Sure enough, when we really got talking over spicy dosas and tea on Gerrard St, we made an entire plan (plus financing!) for my next album.

That alone was worth the drive.

That, and the fact that I bought a book called "On Bullshit" that is literally a book about the art of bullshitting. Yes please.

Dears. Some good news.

I've got an idea for my next album percolating in the back of my brain. Realistically, it will be at least two or three years before I can put it into motion, but I swear it will come sooner if I win the lottery.

I learned a lot from releasing my last record. I'm thankful that I didn't get hit with any particularly gruelling lessons; after all, I had released albums before and had already worked out the major kinks. I'd say my biggest problem with this last CD was the cost, since it was self-financed and as professional as I could make it without resorting to a diet of rice and lentils. It was my choice to go with the best manufacturing, mastering, recording and advertising that I could manage, and I'm still paying that off. Not to mention a costly CD release, which eventually paid for itself, THANK GOD, because otherwise I'd be in deep shit.

At the same time, I don't regret it. The album took off without me having to lift a finger, and I'm hoping that's because the product was solid. I'm glad I made the effort at the start so that I could relax a little more later on. Relax, burn out, whatever.

Next time will be different, I imagine. I'll be applying for grants, although I'm not holding my breath considering how many talented people compete for those things. I'll be doing all my pre-production at home, and hopefully my studio time will be spent laying down tracks I've already figured out months in advance (I can see myself laughing at this sentence later on). Manufacturing will be tough, because I actually don't like to cut corners on the quality of the CD, digipack, pictures etc. So that has yet to be determined.

And I'd like to make a music video for the next album too. Ouch.

It's okay though. I've got a couple of years to think it through. But for the first time in a while, I can see the album in my mind. It's a nice feeling. Or, it doesn't feel like panic... Yet.

OH!

I have made a shitty video for y'all about how I write songs. Not that I set out to make the video shitty, it's just that I recorded it on my digital camera at 12:30 am last night in my pajamas. Quietly. Because everyone else was asleep. And I may have uttered the phrase "pulled it out of my ass" while gesturing wildly at nothing in particular.

Anyway. It will be posted here as soon as I have a chance to upload the dang thing. Promise.