Hella Stella

1. I won the fight. Thanks, inner Transformer. New job for spring / summer! Woot! (picture me flexing my biceps)

2. I am so, so, so damn tired. I spent the weekend holed up in the studio, and although it was insanely productive and fun, I feel completely braindead. People have been asking me questions all morning and I've just been looking at them blankly, forgetting to respond.

3. We ended up hiring a longtime blog reader to play on the album yesterday! Hi Dave! Sometimes I forget that people actually read this thing.

4. Milan stopped by to take some photos of the studio... Maybe you'll see them here soon. My little point and click can't compete with his impressive lens. (Mind out of the gutter, y'all. I'm actually talking cameras here.)

5. My BH will be finished his housesitting stint as of tonight, and he's promised me a hot date upon his return. Yessss. He bought me tulips on Saturday, and I've gotta say, I miss the guy something fierce.

I feel like there is more to tell you, but I think I'll just stare blankly at the wall for a while and fantasize about sleep.

I received some news this week. It's both good and bad, but since I've had time to reflect, I'd say it's mostly bad.

I will be working every weekend in February, full shifts, Saturdays and Sundays. This is on top of my 8 - 9 hour daily shifts on weekdays. So, yes, I'm working 34 days in a row, if you do the math with a calender handy.

WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT.

I guess the good news is that I will get assloads of overtime. But at what cost? My mental stability? I had accepted to work weekends because I had been told it would only be for the occasional Sunday. How wrong I was.

When I was a student, I worked three part-time jobs in my last year on top of my full course load. One job was a TA in radio editing. One was at the CBC. One was in government. Jobs that required my actual attention. I was also gigging a fair amount.

I went many months without a real day off, and I survived. But DUDES. I am out of practice. I haven't needed to be a brain-eating zombie in a long time. I've become accustomed to going home and making dinner. I like having these luxurious things called "weekends."

It's especially laughable that I've been turning down gigs because I am "writing an album" this winter. When the fuck am I going to do that, self? Hmmm? Damn good thing I didn't take on any shows, I guess.

Also, I may have to drop out of choir, since I can't actually make any of the rehearsals. That's probably what's making me the most upset. I'm finally in love with choir again. I don't want to stop.

Anyway. For those kind souls about to comment and ask me why I don't just say no, I can assure you... If it wouldn't totally screw over my team and hurt my career, I would. But at this point, it's a short-term pain thing. Luckily, I pretty much adore my co-workers.

In other more hilarious news, this morning Morty mounted my cloth shopping bag on our walk and humped the crap out of it. Since I was holding it at the time, it looked especially strange. And kinda awesome. I don't know what he was thinking... He's not much of a humper.

I successfully distracted him with a tripe cookie.

God I love my insane dog.

My brain has been so full lately that I can't get to sleep. No matter what time I crawl into bed, my thoughts run on a hamster wheel until about 2am.

It's draining me.

It gets especially bad when my BH needs to get up at 5:30am. His alarm clock usually wakes me, and then, y'know.... Three hours of sleep before I hit the office.

(A couple of folks have used the old "just wait until you have kids" line on me when I mention my drastic lack of sleep, but here's the thing: I don't have kids yet. I'd like to enjoy sleeping through the night while I still can. Two to three hours is not cool when I have to work all day.)

Not everything sucks, though....

The renovations on the apartment upstairs are nearly done. Hopefully within a week or so, the drilling will stop.

I got invited to a party where I get to dress up as a gay lumberjack.

Morty is behaving like a giant snuggly bear, and I love it. I bought him a rainbow bandana so that he is properly dressed up when Pride rolls around again.

Milan will be back soon, and when regains feeling in his butt after being stuck on a bus for ten years, I can hear all about his trip.

My BH is super awesome and took me on a hot coffee date last night. I love those.


So. that's my wee list of happy things. Even on three hours of sleep, I can appreciate them.

Well darlings, the conference was great. I am wiped. WIPED. My body doesn't respond well to 4am bed time, but again. It was worth it.

I have so many pictures to share and so many great bands to talk about. I'll try and upload them tonight so you can get down with the funky music.

As for the aftermath... Well.... My throat is sore, and I've lost my beloved capo.* Not a bad haul, overall. HOWEVER.

That is the fifth capo I've lost since I started using, uh, expensive capos. They are $30 each. With tax, I've thrown away about $200 on clumsiness. Sad. Ironically, I had a leatherworker friend make me a custom guitar strap with a capo holder built in for just this situation.

I still lost the fucking thing.

Most unfortunately, I only noticed my capo was missing at 2:30am in the middle of a set. I had finished all my open songs, looked around, and realized that I was screwed. Luckily, when your audience is drunk, it's easy to pretend that you know what you are doing when your gear craps out.

I met one of my favourite songwriters this weekend, too. Turns out he's actually very funny. I'll tell you about my dorky conversation with him in the next post. I think I used to be a lot smoother when I met people I was crazy about. Those days are gone. It's like someone turned up my dork factor to maximum.

More later, but for now, I have to make sure I don't fall asleep in some random place before the day is done.

*A capo is a little thingy you put on your stringed instrument to change the key. It's very useful, and about 80% of my songs involve capo usage.

The past two days reminded me why I need to get better sleep during the week. The weekend arrives, and I feel so drained that I pretty much want to nap the hours away. I fell asleep three times yesterday in completely random places! Not cool at all.

I still got some fun things done, exhaustion aside. There were two birthday parties, both of which allowed me to catch up with some friends and consume tasty snacks. One party featured the ever-popular unexpected queer dancing (I've had Prince in my head ever since), while the other featured unexpected adorable baby cheeks.*

I also cleaned parts of the house, which is no small feat when you're *this close* to passing out on the couch. I've officially put away my summer clothes and I've taken out the Rubbermaid of hats and scarves. My BH and I did a grocery shopping at the Superstore, which is madness at any time, but especially on a weekend. Oh well. We're fully stocked up on black beans and white vinegar, at least. What more does a person need? (plenty more, but I like those two things)

Lately I've been fiddling with our finances, since this is the last year (I HOPE) that we'll be splitting one salary into a billion different directions. Basically I'm going to spend the next eight or nine months just trying to make things work: paying bills, paying debts, putting aside for a trip to Japan. Then I'll reevaluate and retool again. This is about the only time I actually enjoy doing math.

I've also tried to encourage myself to stay organized by overhauling my system of keeping lists and notebooks. I may have mentioned that I am joined at the hip to my notebook. It's a hard cover, lined, ring-bound book and I keep track of my life in it. Recently, I decided that I could change my unmovable system, which I've been using in some form since high school. I needed the rings and hard cover when I was in university or shuffling between part-time jobs - this made sure the book didn't bend when I threw it in my bag, as well as letting me open the book all the way around for ultimate list access.

Now that I have a grown up, full-time job (and have for several years), I think I can be a bit more flexible. Gone are the days or morning class, afternoon shift, evening shift, homework until 3am. Now I'm using a black, lined Moleskine for my lists, and a bright green Moleskine for my finances. It even sounds grown up. To be honest, I'm a bit surprised at how well it works. I was just so attached to my ringed babies, I suppose...

So... Are you all asleep? *tap tap*

What can I say? I find notebooks almost as exciting as organizational shelving. Y'all are just lucky that I don't have any more room for shelving in my apartment, or you'd probably all be comatose by now.

*I was hoping to put up a picture of said queer dancing, but most of the pictures feature my boobs or somebody's fine booty. My camera has a mind of its own! Totally not my doing! Promise!

Oh, Toots and the Maytals blew my mind. Xavier Rudd was great too, but seriously. Toots all the way.

Tonight I'm seeing The National and K'naan, and let me tell you, people just give me blank stares when I say that I'm going to see someone other than Kiss. I know Kiss is legendary. I know they're insane. But K'naan and The National are pretty much the perfect bill for me, so that's why I paid the big bucks. Not for the old dudes with makeup.

Besides which, I'm already totally freaked out about the sheer number of people who will be there tonight. I would not willingly wander over to the main stage. It remains to be seen whether or not I'll even be able to HEAR K'naan over the Kiss madness.

I freaking hope so. Because K'naan? I love him.

I've been going to bed so late this week, and I can already feel it in my throat. Every time I deprive myself of sleep, I get sick. It's pretty predictable, but sucky nonetheless. I should be able to do some napping this weekend - in fact, I'll have to make it happen, because I don't want to be smacked down with a giant cold.

... Especially since I've got a wild wedding coming up that requires me to get my dance on. Gotta fight for your right to party, nece-pas?

I am wearing my favourite post-work uniform: ragged boyfriend sweater, ratty pink pj pants and t-shirt that says I am a "fantastic father." I'm not looking smoking hot per se, but holy hell am I comfortable.

My BH is asleep face-down on the couch, and Morty has taken this opportunity to curl up on his ass. It's the cutest. It'll be even better when they both start muttering in their sleep.

Today was rough... Lack of sleep, lack of lunch, general annoyances that come with office work. I am so happy to be home.

All I've got left on my slate is feeding Morty his pill, cleaning the kitchen, and going to bed. I'd love to be asleep by 7:30 tonight.

I'll tuck in before the sun.

Happy end of Monday.

Yesterday was the weirdest day. I felt foggy and out of it, and wandered around in my favourite ratty sweatshirt and jeans in a daze. I noticed at about 11pm last night that I had also been sporting the blonde equivalent of an afro all day. HOT.

It didn't help that I only had three hours of sleep. Although I was good and tired, my brain wouldn't shut up. Chatty chatty chatty. Eventually I gave up on the idea of sleep and baked stuff.

First I made a soup with every green leafy thing I could find in my fridge. Chard, kale and spinach, creamed together in a nice broth.

Then I made a fruit cobbler even though I had almost no fruit. We're talking one apple and some very tart plums. I added some cranberries and mangos from the freezer and VOILA! Super tart cobbler. My BH and I made jokes about being tarty. It was a good time.

Then I noticed that y'all were sticking up for my tofu-loving, tarty, gambling behind. Thanks! I'm sure Zoom's video will blow you all out of the water. I'm happy to convert the rest of you tofu-haters, should you need it.

My BH's birthday is coming up and I'm getting really excited about his gifts. He's dangerously easy to buy for. He and Heather are the two folks in my life who I can always spoil rotten - they like so much fun stuff! DANGEROUS.

I'm also thinking of booking off a week in May to do nothing. I'm saving up for Japan, so any vacation I take until then will be of the do-nothing variety. That way I can blow my cash on bento supplies and drinks for M-A so she won't make me do karaoke. I have a plan, folks. It involves vodka.

I had a lovely weekend, threatened only by the fact that I had two very short and very bad sleeps.

They would have been long and pleasant sleeps, but Morty was snoring so loudly that the mattress shook. I lay awake between 4am and 7am both nights, occasionally tilting Morty's head this way and that, trying to stop the sound. When it finally stopped (at 6:45 am), my BH spread out his limbs like a starfish and sighed happily in his slumber. I was pushed off the bed.

Like I said. Bad sleep. (And another shining example of why I need a king-sized bed!)

Everything else was great.

I had a tasty breakfast with Robin, Zoom and the GC, while XUP tended to her daughter's broken bones.

Later that evening, my BH and I showed Milan how to make Fresh's always-amazing crispy tofu recipe. I insisted on the tofu lesson after Milan revealed that he doesn't cook very often, and as a result, eats mostly beans. "Unacceptable!" I screeched. Poor soul. Luckily, he brought wine, and I got kinda stupid after that. He and my BH talked at length about web comics while I sat drunkenly on the couch, rubbing Morty's tummy.

I also seem to remember Milan re-explaining his elephant penis theory, which I have requested he blog about since I can't seem to wrap my brain around it. But it does involve length approximation and pee.

Sunday I lived up to my promise to help Tiana organize her kitchen cupboards. I love to organize, and she prepared a giant fruit platter, so it was a fair trade. Since we had never met in person, we made a pact that we wouldn't break each other's knees should one of us turn out to be in the mob. It worked; we are both still walking today. Tiana also has shiny new cupboards with sexy labels and proper spice containers. Joy!

My only weekend disappointment was my attempt to make bread using the wrong kind of flour. Did you know whole wheat doesn't rise the same way as white all-purpose? I knew that too, but I grabbed the wrong container and mixed it (and baked it!) before I noticed. LAME.